Latest Whatsapp Messages and SMS {2016}

Whatsapp Messages

Never steal. The government hates competition.
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I still miss my ex – but guess what? My aim is getting better
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I want to kill the hottest person alive… but suicide is a crime!
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Earthquake Aane Pe Ghabrayein Mat… Yeh Karein
1. Turant Apna Facebook Status Update Karein
2. Bhaag Ke Jaan Bachayein
3. Bahar Aake Bheed Ke Saath Ek Selfie Lein
4. Bhale Hi Apni Fati Padi Ho But Khud Ko Cool Show Karein, Ghabrayein Mat, Doosro Par Hanse
Ki Saale Kaisa Bhaaga Tu
Janhit Mein Jaari!
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full enjoy kiya msg
Boys agar ladki do din pyaar se baat kare.. aur fir achaanak
baat karna band kar de.. toh samajh lo.. uski
boyfriend se sulah ho gayi hai.
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karuna par sms wth image
Us bewafa ki yaad me jam hathon me utha liya
.phir lagaya bread pe aur fatafat khaa lia:-)
Moral: sab aashiq sharabi nahi hoty kuch meethy k b shoqen hoty he.
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Whatsapp Msg

Guy : MCD mei kisey vote diya?
South Delhi Girl : McD? ewww. I prefer Johnny Rockets or Burger King.
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My love for you is like a fart.So that
Everything about it is powered by my heart.
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“Value of relation” is not that how much you feel happy with some one.
But it is that so how much some one feels ALONE without you!
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Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.
Boy: What are the two things?
Girl: Your feet.
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Jr N: Enti babay kotta kurchi ekkadidi?
Balayya: Adem ledura ninna interview ki vellite take your seat annaaru. Andike pattukochchaaaaaa.
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Whatsapp sms

Dunia me SirF 2 Chize hi MasHoor Hai
Mera Style OR Mere GF Ki SmiLe…
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I want my Girlfriend like Google
She will understand me better.
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Failure means you didn’t tried your best.
Be yourself, no matter what others think. You have to live your life, not they.
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Kuch Dene Ke Liye,
Dil Bada Hona Chahiye, Hesiyat Nahi.
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Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack of opportunity
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I’m pretty sure the whole “ladies first
thing was created by a guy just to check out ass.
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Whatsapp funny messages

Tuhar sms jab awat hai Hamar rom rom
khil jawat hai badan ma gudgudi howat hai
Esma tumar sms ka kaunu kasur nahi hai
Sasura hamar virator on rahat hai…!!!
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ekh tere Sansaar ki haalat Kya ho
gayi Bhagwan kitna BADAL GAYA
INSAAN. NA KOI SMS, NA KOI CALL,
Hum Bhi Hai Hairaan, Kaise BUSY HUYE SHAITAAN….
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Phool hoon gulaab ka,
Chameli ka mat samjhna.
Aashiq hun aapka,
Apni saheli ka mat samjhna.
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Baburao : Aye Raju… Aaj meri Kutti ne anda diya…
.
Raju : Ye Kutti kab se Anda dene lagi…
.
Baburao : Ye Baburao ka Style hai re baba…
Apni Murgi ka naam kutti rakha hai…
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Ladka (Ladki se) : Tumhari Shirt fati hui hai.
Ladki : Tum nahi samjoge… Ye aaj-kal ka Fashion hai.
Ladka : Kya yar… ! Sala tum fado to fashion aur Hum fade to sidha Police Station.
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Boy (Girlfriend se) : Darling… tum muje kitna pyar karti ho ?
Girl : Jitna tum karte ho jaan…
.
Boy : Iska matlab ki tu bhi bas “Time Pass” hi karti hai.
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Santa ki Wife pregnant thi, Santa usey Hospital le gya, Nurse se bola ki –
Tum muje direct mat bolna ki kya hua hai.
Agar Ladka ho to kahana Tamatar hua hai.
Aur Ladki hui to kahna Pyaz hui hai.
Ab ittefak se Ladka-Ladki dono judva ho gye.
Nurse confusion me bahar aayi aur boli : Sir badhai ho, Salad hua hai.
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Whatsapp Messages in Hindi

Bhukamp Ki khabar sunte hi….
Admin ghar se bahar bhag Gaya hai
Abhi tak koi pata nahi ..
Kisi ko dikhai de to Bata dena!!
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Whatsapp ek masti hai
Call se sasti hai
Neend ko udati hai
Khoon ko badati hai
Dimag ko pakati hai
Par kuch bhi ho
ek doosre ki yaad to dilati hai
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Goli maar dunga,
agar kisine group ADMIN ko kuch bola..
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Beti: Maa Gaon mein Group wale aaye hain
Maa: andar aaja inki niyat bahut kharab hoti hai
Beti: Maa Admin sahab bhi hain
Maa: to bakri ko bhi andar le aa.
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Old Generation: Neki kar, Dariya mein daal
New Generation: Kuch bhi kar, Facebook &amp, Watsapp pe daal.
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50 Londe lekar to koi bhi group bana sakta hai..
Members ko khush karne ke liye
3-4 ladkiya bhi add kar do..
tabhi members active rahege..!!
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Dil ne kaha dosto ko message kar,
Mobile uthaaya,
phir socha rahne de
DIL TO PAAGAL HAI

Phir socha DIL paagal hai to kya hua,
Dost kaun se normal hai ..!!
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Ladki waale: Ladka kya karta hai aap ka.
Maa: Bahut hi mehanti hai,
Subha-Sham laga rahta hai..
Candy Crush me 268 level par hai
aur whatsapp me 12 groups ka admin hai.
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Hasi mazak ke wo pal yaad rakhna,
Meri is dosti ko yaad rakhna,
Mehfil mein kal main rahu ya na rahu,
EK THA TIGER.. Aap ke group mein bus itna yaad rakhna.
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Whatsapp dare messages

Send me a pic of you wearing the least clothes on you
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When you see a falling star in night, make
a wish, it will come true b’coz I wished and I found you.
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Wife: Suno Doctor Ne Muje 1 Mahina Aaram Ke Liye
Switzerland Ya Paris Jaane Ko Kaha Hai…
Hum Kaha Jayenge ?
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Wife (On valentine’s day): Kya gift du..?

Husband: Pyaar se dekha karo..
Izzat karo..
Tameez se baat kiya karo..
Yehi kaafi hai..!!

Wife: Nahi, me to gift hi dungi..!!!!!
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Bivi k thappad marne k bad pati bola Admi use hi marta h jise vo pyar karta h.
bivi ne bhi 2khich k mari or boli-Ap kya samjte h mai apse pyar nahi karti.
Husband: Dusre Doctor ke Pass!
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Whatsapp messages collection

Pati: aji suna? Videshon me talaak lena bahut hi aasan hai.
Patni : pata hai tabhi to vaha ladakiyan shadi ke samay roti nahi hain.
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Wife: Jab desi pite ho toh Paro kehte ho.
Jab whisky pite ho to Darling.
Aaj kya piya jo chudail kehte ho?
Husbund: Aaj main hosh me hu!
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Chae ki patti (tea)
aur pati (husband)
me kya similarity hai?
.
Dono k naseeb me jalna aur ubalna
likha ha & woh b
aurat k hathon.
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Hubby: Call Ambulance! I’m having a heart attack
Wife: Okay! Give me your mobile password
Hubby: Its okay, I’m good …!!
Men will be men…..
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pati-kyu na aj ki chaye bahar pi jaye?
patni-kyo?tmhe kya lagta hai mai chaye banate -2 thak gye hu?
pati- nahi ,pr mai plate aur cup dhote dhote tang aa gaya hu.
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pati-raja dashrath ki 3 patni thi..
patni-to?
pati-to mai abhi 2 shaddi aur k sakta hu..
patni-soch lo….!!!!draupati k 5 pati the….
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Whatsapp nice messages

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class
because it was a weapon of math disruption.
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Salam arz hai.
Jawab karz hai.
Dena farz hai.
Nadena marz hai.
Na koi karz hai.
Bas etna arz hai…
Kaisay hai Aap???
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Die Laughing
Biwi Bathroom Se Naha Ke Nikli To Uska Pati Use Ghur Raha Tha!
Biwi Romantic Hokar Boli: Kya Irada Hai?
Pati Ne 2 Thappad Maare Or Bola..
‘Mere Garam Pani Se Kyu Nahayi’
Happy winters..
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Wife: Meri sharafat dekho..
Maine tumhe dekhe bagair shaadi karli…
Husband: Aur meri sharafat dekho..
Maine dekh kar bhi inkaar nahi kiya..
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Hosla mujh mein nahi tujhko bula deny ka,
Kaam sadiyon ka hai, lamhon main kahan hota hai
Kafi hai husn dil ko behlane ke liye,
mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
chahe bhale paray ghum se vasta,
ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab ghamon ko bhulanay k liye
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Best friends are like a pair of shoes,
You have many options to select,
But when selected you can step a single step without it,
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Whatsapp love messages

Don’t love the person who enjoyz with you..
Love the person who really suffers without you
B’coz..
The pain of real love
Can never be defined
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Kabhi ye mat socho ki aapki girlfriend ne aapko kitna Romantic SMS bheja hai,
Hamesha ye socho ki wo SMS usko kisne bheja hoga???
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Some things can b left undone.
Some words can b left unsaid.
Some feelings can b left unexpressed
but
Some 1 like u can never b left unremembered.
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What is a flower without the sun,
what is the earth without the sky.
What am I without you,
that is why I tell you .
I love you.
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Chahe to humein Dil se mita dena, Chahe toh humein Dil se bhula dena.
Magar aaye jab meri yaad, Rona mat sirf muskura dena.
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Duriyon ki parva na kijiye, Dil jabhi pukare bula lijiye.
Hum zyada door nahi aapse, Bus apni aankho ko palko se mila lijiye.
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Riste hote hain zindagi bitane ke liye.
Ham apni hasti mita de ise nibhane ke liye,
Milne ka to naseeb nahi,
Lo SMS kiya apni yaad dilane ke liye.
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You are my star on a dark night, you are my hope
when all is bleak, if it wasn’t for you, I’d never be me!
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Best Whatsapp sms in Hindi Language

Kuch sitaron ki chamak nahi jaati, Kuch yaadon ki khanak nahi jati.
Kuch logon se hota hai aisa rishta, Ke door rehke bhi unki mehak nahi jaati.
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Hubby: Aaj Sabji mein Namak thoda zyada lag raha hai..!!!

Wife: Namak barabar hai..!!
Sabji thodi kam thi..!!

Wife is always right.
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Husband: Dekho Main Chahe Jaisa Bhi Hoon,
Par Baccha Ek Dum Sunder Hona Chahiye.
Wife: Dekho Ji, Choice Is Yours, Baccha Yaa
Toh Sunder Hoga Yaa Aap Ka Hoga.
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Mom to Children: Jo meri baat maanega aur
muze ulta jawab nahi dega,
usko main Gift dungi..
Children: Lo kar lo baat is tarah to..
saare gift Papa hi le jaayenge!!
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Son to Dad: Papa, Mein itna bada kab hounga ki
mein mummy se bina puche bahar ja saku?
Papa: Beta abhi itna bada to mein bhi nahi hua!!!
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Wife: Suno ji, agar tumhaare baal isi raftaar se
jhadte rahe toh main tumhein talaaq de doongi!!
Pati: He BHAGWAN, aur main paagal
inko bachaane ki koshish kar rahaa tha!
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Biwi ko din me karoge to wo sust rahegi,
Sham ko karoge to chust rahegi
Roj karoge to tandurast rahegi,
Karte rahoge to khush rahegi,

‘Office se Roj Sirf 1 Call’
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Train main ek husband apni wife se:
Tujhse shadi karke pachta raha hun
Dil kerta hai tujhey kutto ke aage daal dun..
Samne wala passenger: wao wao wao wao!
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Husband- Agar mujhe lottery lagi to tum kya karogi?
Wife- Aadhe paise le kar Hamesha keliye mayke chali jaungi..
Main bhi khush aur aap bhi khush..
Husband- 20 Rs. ki lagi hai.. ye le 10 aur nikal.
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Latest whatsapp messages

Pee hai sharab har gali har dukan se,
Ek dosti si ho gai hai sharab ke jaam se,
Guzre hain hum ishq mein kuch aise mukam se,
Ke nafrat si ho gai hai mohabbat ke naam se.
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The soul that is within me
no man can degrade.
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All animals are equal, but some
animals are more equal than others.
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The best part of beauty is that
which no picture can express.
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Asi Chetak Scooter Utte Beh ke.
lai lainde feeling mahgi caraan di…
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Distance and time don’t matter
anymore when you are in my heart.
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I want my Girlfriend like Google
She will understand me better.
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Whatsapp forward messages

Trying to figure out who’s texting whom!
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U r getting angry now C No.12.
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This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat
to cat, keep cat, an cat, idiot cat, too cat, busy cat
for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat!
Now read it without the word cat.
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Fiqr kar uski jo apki fiqr kre_ Vase to zindgi
mai bhut hai hamdard Insaan…
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There is One Problem In World
Without Solution is Girl Friend..!
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oi phoolo se karta hai pyar koi kaanto se hum
unse karte hai pyar jo hum se krte hai pyar..##
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Cool whatsapp messages

Always WRONG PERSONS Teach the
RIGHT LESSONS in Life.
That is called LIFE EXPERIENCE.
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‘EGO’ is the only Requirement
to Destroy any Relationship.
Be a Bigger Person,
Skip the ‘E’ & let it ‘GO’.
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Never Win People with Arguments.
rather Defeat Them with Ur Smile.
Because People who always Wish to
Argue with U, cannot Bear Ur SILENCE.
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The midget fortune-teller who escaped from
prison was a small medium at large.
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In a democracy it’s your vote that counts.
In feudalism it’s your count that votes.
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Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, “I’ve lost my electron.”
The other says “Are you sure?” The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive.”
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A bit emotional but true…..
Most of us miss out life’s big prizes
Nobel…
Oscar…
Grammys…
Degrees…
Best Job…
1st rank…
But we are all eligible for life’s small prizes
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Picture msg for whatsapp

I don’t know if this is aw or funny, but it looks both

You can’t help but laugh at this hilarious scene
which these people got them into
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This is the way nature joins in on the fun squad.
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Now, this is something which every guy would love to out, as a DP of course!
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What a way to woo women, isn’t it? Men could share it too.
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Whatsapp msg for friends

Bachpan me dosto ke paas watches nahi thi
magar sabhi ke paas kaafi TIME tha.
Aaj sabhi ke paas branded watches hai
par time kissi ke paas nahi.
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Friend aur Best friend mai kya
farq hai…..??
.
Friend kehta hai- plz drive
safe & Slow
.
Best friend kehta hai:- Bhaga saale aage scooty pe item ja rahi hai.
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RESULT AGAR ACHCHA HO:

Maa – Bhagwan ki kripa hai.
Papa – Beta Kiska Hai.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

RESULT AGAR BURA HO:
Maa – Aag lage is mobile main.
Papa – Laad pyar ne bigaad diya.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

BIRTHDAY PER:
Maa – Jug jug jiye mera beta.
Papa – Hamesha aage badhe.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

LOVE MAIN FAIL HONE PER:
Maa – Beta Bhool ja usko.
Papa – Mard ban.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

Moral – Dost kabhi nahi badalte 😉 😀
Dosti zindabaad
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Sacha Dost Wo Hai Jo
Apki Aankhon Mian Us Waqt
Dard Dekh Leta Hai
Jab Duniya Kah Rahi Ho Yaar
Tum Muskurate
Bohat Ho!!
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A friend is SWEET when it’s NEW,
It’s SWEETER when it’s TRUE,
AND YOU KNOW,
It’s SWEETEST when it’s YOU.
!!Happy Friendship Day!!
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Achha Dost Haath aur Aankh ki Tarah hota hai.
Jab Haath ko Taklif hoti hai to Aankh Roti hai.
aur Jab Aankh roti hai to aath Aansu Pochta hai.
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Whatsapp comedy messages

Aapki Dosti hamein is kadar pyaari hai,
Jiss tarah bin pani ke machli bechari hai,
Ab na aur kuch khawish hai,
Bus tum DOST bane raho yeh hi tum se guzarish hai.
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Everyday is a wonderful opportunity to care,
To smile to pray and to be thankful,
For having a sweet wonderful friend like you…
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Our friendship is like the hands of clock
Though we are in the same clock,we r not able 2 meet
Even if we meet.. It is only for few minutes
But still our friendship runs non-stop.
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Khuda ke ghar se kuch gadhe yun faraar ho gaye
Kuch toh pakde gaye or kuch humare yaar ho gaye
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Kehte hain Khuda ne Es Jahan Main Sabhi k Liye Kisi na
Kisi ko Banaya hai..
Tou Kiya Meri Wali Target Killing Main
Maari gai kia ?
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Ek Mahila bahut dino se bimar thi
Mahila – Doctor sahab dawaiya kab tak chlengi
Doctor – phle ye bataiye
ab aapki tabiyat kaisi hai ?
Mahila – phle se to kafi thik hai
Aaj suhab to thodi ladai bhi ki thi unse
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Phone Rings Late Night:
Hubby- Honey if anyone asks about me, then say I am not at home
Wife picked and said: He is at home
Hubby shouted: WTF… are u insane!!
Wife: Shut up! It was for me
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WhatsApp chhote bachho ke diaper ki tarah hota hai…
.
Hota kuchh nahin,
Lekin har 5 minute me check karna padta hai!
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Girish Chouhan is Digital Marketing Specialist and SEO Expert. We have created this awesome entertaining website to provide you all latest status, quotes, dp's, images or wallpapers, whatsapp guide and much more related to WhatsApp.

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